Seaching Seaching & Seaching
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Wellcum! Wellcum!
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Old Pussy!
Posted by Horny Ang Moh at 12:12 PM 1 comments
Labels: OGI PALAH
Sunday, July 25, 2010
How Nice If I Am A Bull!!!!
A man took his wife to the Rodeo and one of the exhibits was of
breeding bulls.
They went up to the first pen and there was a sign that said,
"This bull mated 50 times last year."
The wife poked her husband in the ribs and said, "He mated 50 times last year."
They walked a little further and saw another pen with a sign that said,
"This bull mated 120 times last year."
The wife hit her husband and said, "That's more than twice a week! You could learn a lot from him."
They walked further and a third pen had a bull with a sign saying,
"This bull mated 365 times last year."
The wife got really excited and said, "that's once a day. You could REALLY learn something from this one"
The husband looked at her and said, "Go up and ask him if it was with the same cow."
Posted by Horny Ang Moh at 12:09 PM 1 comments
Labels: OGI PALAH
Monday, May 24, 2010
How Do U Buy Your Condoms??
A man walks into a drug store with his 8-year old son.
They happen to walk by the condom display, and the boy asks, "What are these, Dad?
To which the man matter-of-factly replies, "Those are called condoms, son.Men use them to have safe sex."
"Oh I see," replied the boy pensively. Yes, I've heard of that in health class at school.
" He looks over the display and picks up a package of 3 and asks, "Why are there 3 in this package?"
The dad replies, "Those are for high school boys, ONE for Friday,ONE for Saturday, and ONE for Sunday."
"Cool" says the boy. He notices a 6 pack and asks, "Then who are these for?"
"Those are for college men," the dad answers,
TWO for Friday, TWO for Saturday, and TWO for Sunday."
"WOW!" exclaimed the boy, "then who uses THESE?" he asks, picking up a 12 pack.
With a sigh and a tear in his eye, the dad replied, "Those are for married men.
ONE for January, ONE for February, ONE for March....."
Now to all my dear reader.............How do u buy your condoms?
Posted by Horny Ang Moh at 3:58 PM 9 comments
Labels: OGI PALAH
Tuesday, March 09, 2010
Horny Answers 4 'Unsual' ????
Q: WHAT ARE THE SMALL BUMPS AROUND A WOMAN'S NIPPLES FOR? A: It's Braille for 'suck here'. ( Hemmm.........I should have know use this 'knowledge' last time to 'suck' my gf 'nen nen' ) Q: WHAT IS AN AUSTRALIAN KISS? A: It's the same as a French kiss, but 'down under.' (Now I know! Next time I should just ask gf which type of kiss she want? Normal? French? Australian? OR EXTRA SPECIAL AUSTRALIAN KISS!!!!) Q: WHAT DO YOU DO WITH 365 USED CONDOMS? A: Melt them down, make a tire, and call it a Goodyear. (Hemmm........if I have kept all my used 'dom dom' it will be more then enough to make a small bicycle tire! This is because gf always prefer my 'di di undress'!!! Anyway I always deposed my used 'dom dom' in empty Maggi mee bag!) Q: WHY WERE HURRICANES NORMALLY NAMED AFTER WOMEN? A: Because when they come, they're wild and wet. But when they go, they take your house and car with them. (Oh Yes! Some lady r really a hurricane when u have poke them long enough!) Q: WHY DO GIRLS RUB THEIR EYES WHEN THEY GET UP IN THE MORNING ? A: Because they don't have any balls to scratch... (Ok! I will try to see if gf rub her eyes next morning!) |
Posted by Horny Ang Moh at 1:56 PM 3 comments
Labels: OGI PALAH
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
U Wash 'Didi/Poosie' First When Going 2 Bath?
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A. Chest: | |||||
( I am sure most lady will wash their 'nen nen' first! I suppose 'inpatient with people who don't see their way' apply!!! ) | |||||
B. Face: | |||||
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C. Armpits: | |||||
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D. Hair: | |||||
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E. Privates: | |||||
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F. Shoulder: | |||||
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G. Others: So to all my dear readers which part of ur body u wash first when u go 2 bath?!!!! Ah if u want to know which part of my body I wash first, u r most wellcum to take a bath with me! But invitation only apply to ladies..............No way am I going to take a bath with any guy!!!! |
Posted by Horny Ang Moh at 7:02 PM 18 comments
Labels: OGI PALAH
Sunday, November 08, 2009
I Want A Mask! Not A Condom!
IRONY AT ITS BEST
A few thousands people get the Swine Flu,
and everybody wants to wear a mask.
10 million people have AIDS,
and no one wants to wear a condom.
Posted by Horny Ang Moh at 1:11 PM 24 comments
Labels: OGI PALAH
Monday, October 26, 2009
Penis........NOT LONG ENOUGH!!!!
typed:
P E N I S
His wife fell off her chair laughing when the computer replied:
PASSWORD
REJECTED. NOT LONG ENOUGH !!
So how do u over cum such rule........how about the following:-
penis1cm ( look my penis is definitely much much longer then this )
penis2cm
penis3cm
penis4cm
& so on & when u r tried of using cm u can use inches like so:-
penis1in
penis2in...........
fuck ( follow by ur boss name/initial or even ur company name )
fack ( if ur IT bugger always poke into the net )
pussy ( u can use poosie instead )
knnccb ( if ur IT if a hokkian/hakka bugger, it meant 'fuck ur mother smelly pussy )
3278 ( if ur IT is a foochow bugger, it meant fuck ur pussy )
BloodyMary ( if ur IT bugger is a 'Ang Moh' )
FuckMU ( if ur IT bugger is a Manchester United fanatic )
FuckLiverfool ( if ur IT bugger is a Liverpool fanatic )
Well the above is just some of the 'illegal' password, do add some more in the comment!
Have a very nice day to all my dear readers! :)
Posted by Horny Ang Moh at 9:18 AM 0 comments
Labels: OGI PALAH
Thursday, September 10, 2009
'Nen Nen' ( Breast ) Being 'Played' Everyday!!!
Posted by Horny Ang Moh at 8:50 AM 7 comments
Labels: OGI PALAH
Monday, August 03, 2009
10 Types Of Ladies! Which Types R U?
there are 10 types of girl in this word, how? just check it out.
No.1 hard disk girls:
'' she remember everything FOREVER ''
No.2 RAM girls:
'' she forgets about you, the moment you turn her off ''
No.3 CD rom girls:
'' she is always faster and faster ''
No.4 windows girls:
'' every one knows that she can't do anything right, but no one can live without her ''
No.5 multimedia girls:
'' she makes horrible things look beautiful ''
No.6 screensaver girls:
'' she is good for nothing but atleast she is fun ''
No.7 internet girls:
'' difficult to access ''
No.8 server girls:
'' always busy when you need her ''
No.9 e-mail girls:
'' every ten things she says, eight are nonsense ''
No.10 virus girls:
'' also knowns as WIFE when you are not expecting her, she comes,installs herself and use all your resources. If you try to uninstall her, you will lose something, If you dont try to uninstall her......... .....you will lose everything.
So to all my dear readers which types of ladies r u & for the guys which type of gf do u have?
Posted by Horny Ang Moh at 10:38 AM 0 comments
Labels: OGI PALAH
Wednesday, June 03, 2009
Darling 'U R Beautiful'!!!???
Telling your wife she's not pretty may soon be an offense
By MUGUNTAN VANAR
KOTA KINABALU: A husband telling his wife that she is no longer pretty in an attempt to humiliate her can be classified as an emotional violence offence if amendments are made to the Domestic Violence Act (DVA)1994.
The plan is to amend the DVA for the inclusion of a clause on emotional violence against women.
Currently, they are only protected only against physical abuse, Women's Development Department director-general Datuk Dr Noorul Ainur Mohd Nur said.
She said on Wednesday that the aim for proposing the amendment was to safeguard women both physically and emotionally.
Dr Noorul said emotional violence was a form of abuse that would deeply scar a woman and lower their self-esteem, dignity and self-confidence.
“It could be a case where her husband tells his wife she is ugly or humiliates her until she feels emotionally pressured,” she told reporters at the end of a seminar on how to curb violence against women at Wisma Wanita here.
She added they were in the process of bringing the proposed amendments to Parliament.
State Community development and Consumer Affairs Minister Datuk Azizah Mohd Dun closed the seminar organised by Sabah Women’s Affairs Department.
Azizah, in her speech, said that there was a need for the law to protect emotional violence against women.
Posted by Horny Ang Moh at 1:15 PM 3 comments
Labels: OGI PALAH
Friday, May 15, 2009
On Heat! I Am On Heat!
Now this should solve my 'heat' problem except it made me go on 'heat' instead! Now seeing me going about naked in the house make my gf real horny & of cause she fondle & play with my 'bro', that make me go on 'heat' mode so poking session started & that make me sweat all over against!
Posted by Horny Ang Moh at 9:27 AM 0 comments
Labels: OGI PALAH
Monday, March 23, 2009
Dead Cock!
Take a short break from stress and enjoy this joke my dear readers. Ok, this is how it sounds like:
Hope u enjoy this very short entry..........He! He! No much 'activities' due to 'dead cock'!!!
Posted by Horny Ang Moh at 8:53 AM 4 comments
Labels: OGI PALAH
Monday, February 23, 2009
Free Sex!!!
One day, there is a businessman who does not speak good English from China wanted to make his first trip to New York for business purpose. Apart from work, he also wanted to have some pleasure. Among the many places that he intended to go, he was very tempted to see the 'Statue of Liberty'. Hence, he tried to get details from the yellow pages and got the telephone 6662613.
The next day, he was very excited and wanted to see the statue. He then called a taxi. Having problem with his broken English, the following was his conversation with the taxi driver:
Driver: "Where would you like to go, Sir?"
Man: "FREE WOMAN" (direct translation from Mandarin of Statue of Liberty)
Driver: "What? Sir, this is America, nothing is free here."
Man: “How come? But I saw it in the yellow page. Here, I have the number, SEX-SEX-SEX-TWO-SEX-ONE-FREE (instead of Six-Six-Six-Two-Six-One-Three!).
Driver: " ?? ......
I am sure my dear readers that u r aware that all sort of ‘translation got lost’ when direct translation from English to Chinese. He! He! Just a ‘horny’ example!
Posted by Horny Ang Moh at 10:00 AM 6 comments
Labels: OGI PALAH
Monday, February 09, 2009
Firework & Economy...............
Posted by Horny Ang Moh at 2:28 PM 2 comments
Labels: OGI PALAH
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Cock Sing Fuck Chai!!!
Posted by Horny Ang Moh at 12:45 PM 7 comments
Labels: OGI PALAH
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Big Nen Nen (Breast)!!! Slow Down & Look!!!
He! He! To all my dear readers what say u!!! Wishing Happy & Prosperous Chinese New Year to all & please drive carefully & slowly when 'balik kampung'! This is also why the above measure need to be implemented to reduced traffic accident due to speeding!
Posted by Horny Ang Moh at 9:45 AM 3 comments
Labels: OGI PALAH
Thursday, January 08, 2009
Best Deal Of The Year! Free Of Charge!!!!
Posted by Horny Ang Moh at 10:22 AM 4 comments
Labels: OGI PALAH
Monday, December 01, 2008
This is why!!! Horny's Explaination!!!
Posted by Horny Ang Moh at 3:38 PM 10 comments
Labels: OGI PALAH
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
The Banana Test
Please take the following test to check how stresses are you....
There is a very, very tall coconut tree and there are 4 animals.
King Kong, an Ape, an Orang Utan and a Monkey pass by.
They decide to compete to see who is the fastest to get a banana off the tree.
Who do you guess will win?
Your answer will reflect your personality.
Think carefully . . . Try and answer within 30 seconds
Got your answer?
Now scroll down to see the analysis.
If your answer is:
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Orang utan = you're sick,
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Ape = you need a break,
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Monkey = worse, you suppose to be in the hospital right now..
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King Kong = I think you better take 1 year leave.........
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Why?! ????.......
A Coconut tree doesn't have bananas!
Obviously you're stressed and overworked.
Take some time off and relax! He! He! I assume all my dear readers are still working & still having a job. Well if u r now 'enjoying a very long leave' ( unemployed due to the fark up world economy ) well just enjoy & get ready & recharged yourself for yours working life.
Posted by Horny Ang Moh at 10:45 AM 5 comments
Labels: OGI PALAH
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Eat Full Nothing To Do!
So can answer the following question?
Below are four (4) questions and a Bonus question to test your perception, reasoning and the quickness of your logical processing mind ( I assure all my readers are ‘normal’ people ).
They are stated simply so you should try to answer them instantly.
To assure the accuracy of the results, you should not take your time, but instead, answer each of them immediately.
OK?
Let's find out just how clever you really are....
Ready? GO!!! (scroll down slowly to uncover Q's and A's)
First Question:
You are a participant in a race. You overtake the second person. What position are you in?
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Try not to screw up next time. Now answer the second question, but don't take as much time as you took for the first question, OK?
Second Question:
If you overtake the last person, then you are...?
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Answer: If you answered that you are second to last, then you are ; ; ; ;WRONG again. Tell me Sunshine, how can you overtake the LAST person??
You're not very good at this, are you?( Do u feel that u r not very clever now? )
Third Question:
Very tricky arithmetic! Note: This must be done in your head only. Do NOT use paper and pencil or a calculator.
Try it.
Take 1000 and add 40 to it. Now add another 1000. Now add 30 . Add another 1000. Now add 20. Now add another 1000. Now add 10 . What is the total?
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Did you get 5000?
The correct answer is actually 4100.
If you don't believe it, check it with a calculator!
Today is definitely not your day, is it?
Maybe you'll get the last question right... Maybe...
Fourth Question:
Mary's father has five daughters: 1. Nana, 2. Nene, 3. Nini, 4. Nono, and ??? What is the name of the fifth daughter?
Did you Answer Nunu? NO! Of course it isn't.
Her name is Mary! He! He! Did I get u on this? Read the question again!
Okay, now the Bonus round,
i.e., a final chance to
A mute person goes into a shop and wants to buy a toothbrush. By imitating the action of brushing his teeth he successfully expresses himself to the shopkeeper and the purchase is done.
Next, a blind man comes into the shop who wants to buy a pair of sunglasses; how does HE indicate what he wants?
Show some action???
Not lah! It's really very simple. He opens his mouth and asks for it...
Does your employer actually pay you to think??
If so Do NOT let them see your answers for this test! It will be terrible to let them know they actually employed a ‘monkey’!!!
He! He! To all my dear readers now back to work! ( If u r still working!!! ) :(
Posted by Horny Ang Moh at 5:55 PM 3 comments
Labels: OGI PALAH