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To all my dear readers if u find this site too 'horny' then please poke into My Other Site where I am more 'normal!!! Feel free to poke into any link within the post as it normally led to more 'interesting' post! Rest assure it is mostly not paid post! No ads for a 'horny' blogger!!!!

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Farking/Sex Is Good! So Fark EveryDay!

1. Sex is a beauty treatment. Scientific tests find that when women make love they produce large amounts of the hormone estrogen, which makes hair shine and skin smooth. ( So ladies if u want to have shiny hair & baby smooth skin..........get POKED everyday! BTW I do provide 'poking' service. )


2. Gentle, relaxed lovemaking reduces your chances of suffering dermatitis, skin rashes and blemishes. The sweat produced cleanses the pores and makes your skin glow. ( I suppose wild bed shacking poking will 'heal' all this problem in no time! )


3. Lovemaking can burn up those calories you piled on during that romantic dinner.( This I truly believed in as after every poking session with gf I end up half dead where as gf always said ' Some more horny!!!!' )


4. Sex is one of the safest sports you can take up. It stretches and tones up just about every muscle in the body. It's more enjoyable than swimming 20 laps, and you don't need special sneakers! ( It is 'safe' only if u do poking on the floor as I have broken my bed & even fall off the sofa when doing poking on it! Dam it is very painful if u fall on ur upright 'didi'! )


5. Sex is an instant cure for mild depression. It releases endorphins into the bloodstream, producing a sense of euphoria and leaving you with a feeling of well-being. ( All quarrel & disagreement is being solved by having a poking session! If the quarrel is very serious then get ready for a very long poking session! )


6. The more sex you have, the more you will be offered. The sexually active body gives off greater quantities of chemicals called pheromones. These subtle sex perfumes drive the opposite sex crazy! ( Yes! This is very true but u will end up half dead for the guy! )


7 Sex is the safest tranquillizer in the world. IT IS 10 TIMES MORE EFFECTIVE THAN VALIUM. ( Yeah! Yeah! That is why after a long & heavy poking session I will sleep like a dead log! Oh yes! Whenever I couldn't sleep I will poke my gf! Ha! Ha! Ha! )


8. Kissing each day will keep the dentist away. Kissing encourages saliva to wash food from the teeth and lowers the level of the acid that causes decay, preventing plaque build-up. ( This I am not very sure..........beside what if I do most of the kissing? Like on the 'nen nen' & down there? )


9. Sex actually relieves headaches. A lovemaking session can release the tension that restricts blood vessels in the brain. ( He! He! To all my time if u do have a humongous facking headaches just say to ur partner..........'Lets do some facking now! I have a very big headache! Instead of asking for panadol! )


10. A lot of lovemaking can unblock a stuffy nose. Sex is a natural antihistamine. It can help combat asthma and hay fever. ( So do u have poking session with running nose? Yak! I don't! So I think not applicable! )

There u have it! Facking everyday is goof for u & it do tend to solve most married life problem. But unfortunately for me my biggest everyday problem is MONEY NOT ENOUGH!!! No amount of poking will solve my money problem!


Ah Pek said...

"BTW I do provide 'poking' service"

You have a poking machine at home ah?

Horny Ang Moh said...

Hi Ah Pek! Wellcum! He! He! 'Poking machine' is my 'bro'!!!

Ah Mah said...

Is it long and strong?

Miss Seedy Past said...

I wish I lived with my man...there's so many health benefits to having lots of sex. Methinks I need to see him more often.

sgrmse. said...

you're hilarious but it's the preschool spelling (of words used) that's really quite a turn-off.