Seaching Seaching & Seaching

Custom Search

Feel free to search for anythings! Just enter whatever word.


Wellcum! Wellcum!

To all my dear readers if u find this site too 'horny' then please poke into My Other Site where I am more 'normal!!! Feel free to poke into any link within the post as it normally led to more 'interesting' post! Rest assure it is mostly not paid post! No ads for a 'horny' blogger!!!!

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

How To Made Ur 'Pokeing' More Sexited...Part 6

A continuation of part 5 ,part 4 , part 3 ,part 2 & part 1

Everyday U eat ‘kakong’( a type of cheap veggie available everywhere in Malaysia )! Only ‘kakong’ stir fry every single day! Boring or not! I am very sure if u see ‘kakong’ u will rather have banana for lunch then to have another plate of ‘kakong’!But sometime we don’t have a choice we must have ‘kakong’ for food ( because we can’t afford other food & this is the only veges we must have ) so how about cooking ‘kakong’ in some other way instead of stir fry only. How about adding other ingredient to made it more tasty!For example adding ‘balachan’( a type of shrimp paste ), stir dry with red wine etc!

So in a way pokeing is just like eating ‘kakong’ as in poosie ( I am sure u agree with me )!So how to made pokeing into poosie more interesting?

How u do pokeing will already made the pokeing interesting! For example normally u just spray open the leg & poke in so instead of doing it like this u can ‘explore’ around first rubbing ur face ( if u got beard so much better as ladies do like the feeling of ur beard rubbing against her smooth skin. This is also why a lady will not complain if u have a hairy chest ) ur nose & ur tongue to do some lic*king from the leg upward to her love triangle u don’t have to spray her leg ( but she will be more then ready to spray out her leg for u ) before u eat her we*t oyster ( sure some guy will think it is yucky, but I shall say a clean healthy oyster ‘smell like fish taste like chicken’, don’t be selfish after all she did lic*k & suc*k ur banana. A clean & healthy banana taste like ‘raw liver’. But of cause made it tasty by adding other ingredient like sugar syrup. But made sure u finished the syrup first before u do pokeing )!I must add here that a shaved poosie do smell & look different.For more detail poke into shaven poosie .

In other word for*eplay. A good for*eplay sure made pokeing more interesting! Don’t u think it is like how u prepare the ‘kakong’ prior to cooking it? A plate of ‘kakong’ sure will taste better when it is clean properly ( leaches are know to hide among the ‘kakong’ leaf & even inside the hollow stem ) only the greenest & most tender ‘kakong’ is used in preparing the plate of ‘kakong’!

What we see do affect our pokeing performance! Don’t u think ur gf look extra sex*y when she is half dress, in office wear, in socking or even like when she tease u by just letting u see her half cup? I am very sure ur gf will look very very se*xy when she is dress in lin*gerie. Now to made ur pokeing more interesting u can do pokeing half dressed ( u can do round two in the nakel )!

Don’t u think a plate of ‘kakong’ look very tasty if is is nicely arrange in a beautiful plate with side garnishing rather then in a normal tin plate?

Pokeing position of cause made ur pokeing more interesting! Problem is the default position is the missionary position & most guy is don’t wan to try other position, on the other hand ladies more often then not is most willing to try other position. Guy don’t wan to try other position as it is tiring as for eg. in carrying his partner when pokeing ( actually the guy must be a big fellow or the lady is below 50kg. This is a no no when the guy is small or the lady is a heavyweight. The incident of of crashing is real & in some case u end up crashing on top of ur gf or worse still crash ur 'bro'! Pokeing is not deep & lady generally don’t enjoy it. Forget what u see in the xsx movie, for show only ). Among the various pokeing position the do*ggy position is the most enjoyable for the lady! Deep pokeing is possible ( in fact because of deep pokeing she enjoy it. Beside she don’t have to spray her leg wide apart. But this position is difficult to do if the guy have a ‘short’ ‘bro’. Doing doggy need some skill & technique )

The environment also play trick with our pokeing performance! Pokeing in the dark is totally different from pokeing in the light! In all aspect I must say pokeing in the light more interesting! Don’t u think it is more interesting & stimulating if u can see ur own pokeing performance? It is possible if u fit mirror in ur bedroom ( this is why some hotel suite have mirror fitted even on the room ceiling ). Also if u can have soft light fitted in ur bedroom it sure make pokeing so much more stimulation. Soft red light is prefer, yellow is also a good light ( made sure u have heavy curtain on ur window as ur neighbors will guss u r pokeing away when they saw red light in ur room ) . Green color light is a no no, u don’t want to poke a ghost do u!

I am sure a humble plate of ‘kakong’ will look & seem to taste better in a high class restaurant serve in a classy plate in good lighting & environment. Perhaps u can say if tired of eating 'kakong' u can always eat other verge but sometime it is no legal as the 'kakong' u have to eat everyday until kingdom cum is ur wife ( if u r rich or very handsome u can try to eat other verge but it is 'illegal' so this should made it interesting after all forbidden fruits or verge always taste better )!

I use ‘kakong’ in reference to poosie but unfortunately I can’t use banana as reference to a ‘bro’. This is because banana is eaten as it is ( as in ‘bro’ ur gf just lic*k & suc*k it as it is ) at the most u can also eat banana as ‘banana split’ cover in ice-cream.( ‘Pinsang Goreng’ or deep fry bananas is not applicable here ok!) But u cannot cover ur ‘bro’ in ice-cream & ask ur gf to eat it ( ur ‘bro’ will ‘disappear’ in record time )!

To be concluded………..

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

I Get Poked!!!!!!

Woah this is my 100th post! Just couldn't believed how 'hor ny' I am! Me & all my pokeing entries! Now I get poked instead!

He: hemmm let me see ( I let him exam me………. ). Ok ready!

Hor ny: Painful or not?

He: Not painful wan. Why arr big guy like u afraid of pain meh! R u ready?

By now I am all tense up!

He:Oi! Don’t be so tense lah! Relax lah! No painful wan!

Oh! I don’t dare to look! I turn my head away & shut my eye! Without any warning he poke in!

He:Grip a bit tighter ok. Nah! See no painful wan! Seeeee!

I open my eye & see………..

Oh the sight of my blood………….

He:Ah ur first time har?

Hor ny:Yes! My first time being poke there! ( I nodded my head first time being poke there )

I am fascinated by the sight of my blood!

I really get poked…………….

Now where do u think I get poked……….

Now remember I am a guy ( if I am a lady not need to guess lah )…..

Now remember I am not a ga*y……….

See this is where I get poked!
What r u thinking ( I am sure some of u think I get poked in my as*shole ). Yes it is an unusual place to get my blood for my annual blood test! This is because of my baby smooth skin ( sometime I am quite unashamed in praiseing myself )which don’t show up any blood vain so I end up having my hand poked. The doctor use ‘dripping’ method. According to him this is the least painful method. I can see my blood dripping away onto his hand & blood when he change tube ( I do think this is a good method to committed suicide, according to the doctor if I didn’t stopped the blood flow, I will feel weak then I will black out forever! A painless death! Don’t ever try to committed suicide Ok! Just one of my foolish thinking ).

Here is a pic of my three tube of blood! He need three tube to conduct a full blood test check up.

Oh before I forget here is a pic of my early morning ‘tea’ ( urine ) first cup! I know I am in good health even before the result is out as my ‘tea’ is clear and just golden in color. Of cause I have to stuff myself for at least 8 hrs that meant no late night cup of coffee or vico ( I use to have milo but too expensive to afford it nowadays ). Oh yes my ‘tea’ will be cloudy if I do pokeing so that night I am a good boy ( what will the lab boy say if they exams my urine & find it full of hor ny’s swimmer! )

Well the result is out already but I am not totally in the best of health! Apparently my blood is too ‘oily’ & cholesterol is too high! Looking at my blood dripping freely it didn’t look oily to me ( perhaps I have too many pork leg ). Actually I have discover that to made my blood less ‘oily’ I only have to drink a bottle of light beer every night as alcohol will dilute the blood ( however I stop this nightly beer drinking because I don’t like beer & can’t afford it ).

According to my doctor I can have a clean bill of health so long as I do a lot of exercise! This is good news for me as my regular reader will know my all exercise is actually sexerise so more pokeing for me to do!

As for my cholesterol this is bad new! How to give up on pork leg! So tasty & yummy! If cannot eat pork leg how leh? Surely u don't expect me to eat cow leg do u?

Monday, August 27, 2007

8 Hor ny Facts

Aiyoh! Get this tag by Spring Fairy! I have done a similar tag on 7 hor ny fact ( but she insist I do her tag ). So here go the tag…………..8 hor ny fact:-

8 Things That I Think You Don’t Really Know About Me

1.I wear spec! Yah! Without my spec I am blind as bat in daytime 1200 degree! In fact without my spec my world is blur blur wan. Very blur I must say. ( so blur that if a nakel lady is in front of me all I see is black patch on top, a small black patch in the middle! But if she shave then no black patch in the middle lah!But if the ‘lady’ happen to be a ‘guy’ I also cannot distinguish. That is why without my spec I must see near near wan or touch then I know if it is a lady or a men! So ladies if u wan to change it is perfectly safe to do so in front of me without my spec. )

2.I am a heavy weight! Yah 95.5 kg to be precise ( my record is 99.8 kg ) in my natural clothing ( nakel lah ). Due to my weight I do fact have some unique problem! For example my poor motor bike ( Honda Ex5 100 cc ) have a hard time carried me ( max speed only 80kph but if gf use it can almost reach 100kph ). If I sit in a kancil it will go down on which ever side I sit. Of cause when it cum to pokeing ( I am very sure u want to know this ) I must be very very carefull so that I don’t crush my partner!

3.I am 5.6 feet tall! Very ‘tall’ hor! Ok ok I know I am not tall ( how I wish I am taller then I will have a super model as gf but this is only wishfull thinking because if my gf is a tall super model I can only reach up to her nen nen . Yeah I know convenience height to have milk ). So u can now image how I look!

4.Shall I tell u how long I am………..? Oh I think better not as this tag is about me not about my ‘bro’! So I will say I got black hair i.e. O moh. No longer Ang moh! Although a long time ago I did dye it red, brown and almost also dye it green ( but didn’t as no such color at that time )!

5.I am fussy fellow! Because of this I will DIY whenever I can. For example cleaning air-con, setting up hi-fi system both home or car system! All I DIY as I believe I can do a better job & of cause to save money. If I can’t DIY like major car repair then I will be on site to ‘supervise’ or ‘observe’ how it is being done!( this apply to my ‘pokeing’ as I try my best to made sure my partner have a good time. I think I am successful in this sense as so far she have never reject my ‘pokeing’ )

6.I am a shy fellow in real life. Ok ok in certain sense I am shy. For example I prefer to stay in the background doing whatever I am suppose to do quietly! Another example will be I am too shy to ask for a ‘pokeing’ service from a ‘service’ lady ( But my friend always seem to have the abilities to pick ladies for free ‘poke’! Perhaps because he is a rich fellow )!

7.I love to watch documentary show, like discovery channel ( I learn a lot from this show as I am lowly educated ), action movie & I prefer English movie to Chinese wan! I hate watching Korean series movie ( but gf love them, so boring to me, laugh 10 minutes, cry for half an hour, running here & there chasing each other! Ending almost all the same! Either get married or cannot get married as they are bro & sis or don’t get married because one of them died or because there is a part 2! Died lah if she ask me to watch Korean movie with her! )

8.Phew! Last wan! Now what I shall I write arrr?? Oh yes! I am an night owl! I normally go to bed around 12.30am ( after pokeing gf, as normally she went off to bed around 10.00pm unless she watch Korean movie, if no too tired I will watch late night news )!

There all finished! So to my dear reader if u feel like doing this tag, feel very free to do so! Have a nice day!

Friday, August 24, 2007

Should I Do This!!

Warning!! Hor ny post!To all my doctor reader please don't revise ur consultation fee or poke me up-side down or inside out!

Gf :Hor ny I am bored, very bored!

Hor ny:U r bored meh ( I look at her hor nly )...........

Gf :Yalloh ( she snugger closer to me ). Take me somewhere can or not?

Hor ny:Where do u want to go ( she is no going to ask me to accompany her to go shopping )?

Gf :Anyway can do so long as sexiting ( Thank god!Last time I accompany her to go shopping.....& I have the most boring time of my entired life! She enter one boutique after another like no tomorrow & goodness know how many pair of shoes & shirts she try on. No only that I have to give my opinion on every shoes & shirts she try on, dam the sale girls who giggle & enjoy themselves looking at my very bored look & equally bored answer! How nice & sexited it will be if ladies undi*es & br*a can be try on........ I am allowed to look & give comment when gf give it a try! )

Hor ny:Oh! Ok! I got just the place!!!

After driving around I bring her to..........

Gf : Wei! Wei! What r u doing? U crazy or not? ( She 'ketut' my head playfully ) Why did u bring me to a clinic?!

Hor ny:U say anywhere mah. So I bring u here loh.

Gf :I say somewhere sexited!

Hor ny:Yahlah.....sexited! Cum just follow me to see the doctor! ( gf follow with curiosity )

Hor ny to clinic receptionist

Hor ny:Do u have any private examination room? And who is the doctor who specialize in ladies problem, I want a lady doctor for this! ( gf upon hearing this pinch my b*utt & give me a furious look )

Cln Rec: We have private examination room & our lady doctor is Dr Wong. She is free now.

Hor ny:Ok she is perfect!

Gf :I am perfectly Ok! I am not even pregnante!!

Hor ny:Aiyah! U wan sexitetment just fellow along lah!We see this lady doctor first lah. Don't worry wan. ( gf follow me now with very high curiosity )

Hor ny:Good morning doctor! Me & gf got a problem!Can u see if our 'pokeing' is proper?

Dr W :What do u meant proper or not? ( She has the most bewilding look on her face, gf also look the same but with her mouth slightly opened )

Hor ny:Aiyah I don't know how to say it.....Look how about if I 'poke' my gf in ur private examination room & u look at our pokeing & then u gave us ur sexpert opinion?? ( gf gave me a big kick under the table, luckily she didn't squee*ze my ball as she rest her hand on my lap! )

Dr W :Ehhhhh.......this is an unusual 'problem' & request! Well........Ok!

Hor ny:How much is the charge?

Dr W :My consultant fee is Rm35 per hour excluding medical of causes.

Hor ny:Oh that is reasonable. Our pokeing will last about 1 & half hour ( at this the doctor gave me a disbelieving look! And gf now grasp me by the ball! )

Gf :Hor ny! I just have my period this morning!( She gave me a very furious look & grasp my ball firmly )

Hor ny: Oh! Ok! Ok! Sorry doctor! Next time ok. Any charge for this?

Dr W : Its Ok no charge ( Thank goodness! I have only got Rm100 )!

On the way home I got scolded 'kaw kaw' by gf!!!

But seriously I might really give it a try! That is 'Pokeing' in clinic under Doctor supervision! Because it is in private & it is cheap! Cheap because I can claim medical bill!!!But made sure that the supervising doctor is a lady! I don't like the idea of another rod pokeing into gf or worse still what happen if the doctor poke into me! This will happen if the supervising doctor is a man! But it seem that gf want me to herself only!

Another wishfull thinking! But I never give up hope! Any of my ladied readers to help me out?

Monday, August 20, 2007

How To Made Ur 'Pokeing' More Sexited...Part 5

A continuation of part 4, part 3 ,part 2 & part 1

Time or timing is everything...........including pokeing!. Get the time or the timing right, both of u will have a good time. Get it wrong one might feel good while the other get the feeling of 'neither here nor there' or worse still both of u end up feeling ' what is the big deal about pokeing?'.

Everyday if u do things at the exact time or roughly at that time ( for example eating breakfast ,lunch ,dinner , going to the loo for small pe*e or big bomb ) everyday, it soon becum routine & u sort of do all this ‘job’ automatically without thinking. For those who are working, it is the same. Everyday u arrive at ur work place at that time, sit at the same place, do the same job day in & day out soon, it becum boring ( however there are people who love such a job, also know as boring people )

So how about pokeing! Everyday u do pokeing at the same place & at that time on every outing ( for those who is still undecided, unmarried stage 4 couple ). Or u do pokeing every night at 10.30pm ( for example ) when both of u go to bed & do pokeing once a week or even twice or once a month ( actually this is true for people who have being together for more the five years or more & they have more then one kid ). So both of u more or less took this as routine ‘job’ & thus becum boring!

How about changing the pokeing time! Do it at unexpected time ( but of cause u don't do pokeing while driving or when ur gf is cooking ). It does not have to be done after a outing or at time or during the weekend! But do bear in mind a lady does have her ‘hor ny’ period ( one week after her ‘aunty’ visited her ) & her ‘no’ ‘no’ period ( when her ‘aunty’ visited her ) ! Do take note that during her ‘hor ny’ period she is most willing & do look forward to ur pokeing ( if u r good ) but if u still like to do pokeing during her off period she will not be willing ( if u r good she still look forward to it ) & it is a massy job!

In this stressful working life, I am sure married couple hardly find time to relax let alone pokeing! So allow me to made a suggestion. How about pokeing on every third day ( every third day because a guy normally is fully recharged by the third day, well according to my personal sexpriance & from friends also ). Like Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday & Sunday. Or Tuesday , Friday & Sunday. I don’t suggest Monday because Monday is normally the most stressful day of the week!

Now about pokeing timing! This is most importantly. By pokeing timing I refer to the ur pokeing rhythm. Get the timing right u will have a most sexiting pokeing sexperiance! Time ur pokeing differently! For example normally pokeing is like this…… out in out in out with increase in speed & decrease in speed when running out of steam! So how about pokeing differently …….in, in, out, out, in, in, in, out, in, ( u can pull out a bit & then slam in fully or slam in & in……… just vary the pokeing or when ur partner expect u to poke in but u didn’t, u just tease with her lips ). This will made the pokeing more interesting.

Understand ur partner reaction. After a lot of pokeing session u will more or less know when ur partner is going to reach her high ( this is almost an art, if u r good u can even let her have a few high before ur ‘bro’ shoot his bullet, the next round took about 10 minutes to recharge faster if she help u ) ! Don’t be selfish & only let ur 'bro' shoot his bullet without letting her have her high ( I do admit this is a bit difficult for guy with ‘sensitive’ ‘bro’, but with more sexpriance u can gain control of ur ‘bro’ ) !

To be continue................

Friday, August 17, 2007

Bing awarded! B-day gift?

I only got to know this late last night after I poke into father who give me an schmooze award on 16-08-07! Since yesterday is my b-day, getting this award made me feel very happy & hor ny! Tq very much father!

Wah big muscle! Unfortunately my arm muscle not that big! This is a short post ( my shortest so far ) as I am still busy 'developing' my up-cumming 'educational' post on pokeing! Have a nice weekend my dear readers.

Thursday, August 16, 2007

Why am I call Hor ny Ang Moh???!!!

Hor ny:- meant someone with overloaded with se*xual urge, in constant need to poke, a very 'hiao hiao' ( in hokkien meant a very hor ny person ) person. I can't give a exact meanting as even the Advance Oxford Advanced Learner's Dictionary Of Current English don't have the word inside it.

Ang:- meant red in hokkien ( hokkien is a Chinese dialect )

Moh:- meant hair in hokkien

Thus Hor ny Ang Moh meant a hor ny red hair! Ang Moh is also normally refer to Caucasian as normally they have red hair. So in most case it mean Hor ny Caucasian!

One year ago one bored simple fellow is connected to the internet pokeing into all sort of sites (mainly sites showing 'nice' picture after all he is just a normal guy ). That is when he happen to poke into baby jee sites & read this ! (all this while he did poke into all sort of blog but he just see & read at the blog thats all ). Something made him put down a comment on this entry as hor ny ang moh! It could be because baby jee is a cute young lady & he decided to pull her se*xy leg!

After pokeing into baby jee for sometime & under her encouragement( baby assure that blogging is free of charge ), this fellow finally decided to enter into the blog sphere as Hor ny Ang Moh! The first thing that he did is to ask for baby help ( since this fellow is lowly educated & he know nuts about internet coding & whatsoever so he need all the help he can get on-line on internet! Lucky baby is most helpful. She help him to set up the site page & even help him to put up the profile picture. Beside her, this fellow also unashamedly ask all sort of help from his readers )!

This is how Hor ny Ang Moh cum into being. So my dear reader I am not a Caucasian ( my lowly educated English will show straight away that I am not Ang Moh ) but long time ago my 'moh' ( hair ) is 'ang' ( red ) but nowadays it is 'oh' ( black ).

Fast forward to today ( time really fly when u r busy or when u r having a good time just like when u r pokeing away ) I look back and review what have Hor ny Ang Moh achieved. This is my first post with just one & the first reader that is baby jee ( of couse I will also like to thank Iwan-Sanchez who have being so supportive )! Actually my intention to set up Hor ny Ang Moh is just for fun ( after all it started with pulling baby jee's leg ) temporary maybe after a few months I will just 'disappear'. But I end up pokeing into more & more sites & of cause with a hor ny ID I feel very free putting in my comments into almost all the blogs that I have poke into ( unless the entries is too deep for my simple head )! And so with all my dear readers support I last until today & of cause I get more & more hor ny so much so that I am posting up all my personal sexperiances or those that I have done research on under 'hor ny' labels!

Right from the beginning ( even thought it is my original intention for it to be on temporary basic ) I have intended to post up useful & informative entries for all my reader ( from personal experience/sexperiance & knowledge ) so I have DIY & ABC labels, OGI PALAH is for entries which I don't know which labels to use.

Due to my nick as 'Hor ny Ang Moh' I have to live up to my nick ( it would be unsuitable if I post up English literature or history )! That is why I have 'hor ny' labels! By far this is a very popular topic with a lot of reaction from my dear reader! To me its is OK. It doesn't not meant my reader are hor ny, it is after all a subject which all adult should know to have a happy life & family. I am most happy that my hor ny entries is of some use to my reader as no teacher will teach this subject in detail in school! But of cause u can always have a look at the 'nice' dvd movie but it don't give u the pros & cons. One simple example in the 'nice' movie showing 'pokeing' in the wildlife park,its don't show u how many swamp of mosquito is attacking the pokeing couple!

That is why I am so 'hor ny' in blog sphere.

As all if not most of my hor ny entries is base on real life sexepriance mainly with gf ( either current, former or one night stand ) I can never post up my real picture! I will not only be 'ketut' on the head or ears pulled by gf but also will be suicided by my gf if she know I have post up all the 'nice' pokeing detail ( until now she still don't know I have a blog. Oh yes, she did saw me view my sites but I just tell her I am interested to see what a big orang utan is doing & how he 'poke', its for her benefit ). This also applicable to all those that know me ( after all I live in a small & rural town ). This is the disadvantage for posting up all this 'hor ny' entries. I do like to meet my readers ( some of my male reader are awesome and some of my ladies reader are sooooo hot ) but maybe someday I might get to meet them as just a 'simple fellow'. But I am very sure all my reader will have the following reaction!!!

Because I am very sure if I post up my picture my reader will say 'this fellow hor ny meh? He is so ordinary'.This is why I can never post up my picture.

After one year I have 95 posts ( I have no idea I can post up so many entries, during school time even 1000 words essay will cost me to copy from the girl sitting next to me ) .I think not bad for a blogger who started off with just one reader & low in education. Normally when someone started blogging he informed the whole world ( that is his whole family, friends, relative, college and so on and so froth ) to visit his sites & support him like no tomorrow! Me just a simple fellow with a single reader but soon due to my constant pokeing & kind support from mine reader the visitors increased with 12550 sites visitors!. And I also get awarded for being awesome. Nothings made me more happy than to know that my entries made my reader happy & brighten up their stressful life!

So today the real me in the real world wish the 'hor ny' me in blog sphere happy one year old!

And to my dear reader thank you for all your supports & comment. Have a nice day to all my readers!

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

'Eat Not Full, Hunger Not Died'

Life is real bad nowadays!No matter how hard I work & how much I cut back on my spending, at the end of the month still no money! OK! I understand since I have sold myself to a service industry company my salary is more or less fixed!

So the only way I can made end meet is to cut back on spending!I spend a big chunk of my salary on travelling expenses ( no thank to the high fuel price ) so I save by using motorbike ( Honda club ex5 ) traveling to work ( 40kms ). It did save my fuel bill by 80%!!!But in the end I discover I didn't really save that much! Since using bike I just use my Pajero only once a week it retaliated by giving me all sort of small problems, so the money I save on fuel end up spend ed on repair bill for the Pajero ( see my 4x4 mistress don't like being ignore same as gf if u did pay her attention or do any pokeing to her she will say u don't love her & poke elsewhere & she will also retaliated by giving u problem, like cooking lousy food, 'ketut' ur head & in bad mood ).

Another way to save money is to cut down on food! I only spend on good & cheap food that is value for money. So I have not gone to any fast food centre like KFC, McD for a long time already ( when I poke into sites showing good & yummy food pic, I just slap my rumbling stomach & say big 'bro' no money to spend on u, my usual comment is I go to kitchen to look for food! Actually go to kitchen also no use wan as only got Maggi mee & biscuits ). One sure way to spend minimum on meal to take home pack lunch to work on working day ( only applicable if someone can prepare for u ) or better still just have biscuit for lunch! Oh this remind me I have the following the whole day last Sunday!
It has being a long time since I have meat porridge! Taste good to me & help me to save some money! Beside food, I have cut down a lot on entertainment! It has being a long time since I sat in a cinema ( actually no cinema in my small town but got in the neighbouring big town ) so for movie I usually wait patiently for cheap clear DVD to cum ( Rm5 per piece ).

But it seem whatever I save, it will be spend on some new ways. The latest being my Internet bill! I have no one to blame on this but myself! Who ask me to get hook on blogging?

But of cause I can always earn extra by looking for part time job or working during night or on weekend! Since I know a 'bit' on computer hardware & installing programs which include pc-game I did that but spending the whole day installing & teaching some rich fellow & his kids how to use & play game is not really worth it, as I earn only Rm20-00 on service charged & a bit more if he buy the computer system from me!Other then computer I am an 'expert' on pokeing! But I can't really go around the town or advertise in the newspaper " Pokeing Service Available! Buy One Poke Free One Poke!". For ladies it is a different stories of cause! Beside I live in a small town. Maybe I can earn some money this way if live in big cities like KL as I am sure got demand ( according to my friend ).

So now I am in 'Eat Not Full, Hunger No Died' situation( direct translation from Mandarin )!

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Are U A Rice Pot??!!!!!

A rice pot is a pot for storing uncooked rice ( this use to be the traditional method ie an earthen pot, but in this modern age plastic container, pail with cover & for lazy bum just leave the uncooked rice in its plastic bag ). Normally in other language this have no special meaning. But if a Chinese call u a rice pot in he is actually scolding u for being stupid or lazy or both that is a 'stupid lazy bum'! Apparently this is one of the Chinese scolding phase.

But to me there is another meaning! I will refer a person as a rice pot if he can't survive without rice! That is he/she must have rice at least once a day! Without having rice he/she feel very hungry. To this person without having rice as meal is like not having meal! Since rice is a stable food for Asian this is understandable.

But in this modern age, do we still must have rice to survive? How about having bread, noodles or any other food beside rice as our stable food? Can u stand without rice for even one day? How about one year? How about not having rice & have ang moh food year in & year out?

I post this up as among my group when attending a wedding in Batu Pahat is an aunty last month. And this aunty can't survive without rice. By rice as meal she meant white rice with verge & maybe some meat! Because of her I have to search the whole town to find a typical Chinese meal! Oh, she also couldn't eat hot food ( if she can then we will have Indian lunch ) & she say she will be sick if she don't have white rice even chicken rice is not good enough! So imagine my frustration! So many different type of food but I can't really enjoy because of this 'rice pot'!!

Actually for me I can survive on any food so long as I can have meat especially pork. Last time when I first venture out of my hometown to work , I spend a few months on bread, noodles ( Maggi mee ) & even bananas as meal ( in fact bananas is very filling, does having a lot of banana do any good for me? I don't know but I did tell ladies I have a lots of banana as meal so they will get the meaning )!

So can u survive without rice? If u can't then I suppose u r a rice pot after all!!

Sunday, August 12, 2007

Kia or Nokia...........Any other Kia????

To most of us ( well those who like & know a bit about car anyway ) Kia is a Korean car.

But this Korean car is apparently no very popular & even among it current owner as it is not reliable, consume fuel like no tomorrow & its depreciated like no tomorrow also. In short it is a car which people will not like to own it even if there is no tomorrow ( to all Kia owner please don’t poke me upside down & inside out as this is what my friend told me )! So this group of people add a big No to their Kia car. That is Nokia!

Nokia to most of us ( apart from frustrated Kia owner ) is a well know handporn ( apparently nowadays hand phone have another use for the ladies when set to vibrating mode ) from Finnish! This handporn is simple to use cheap & almost indestructible ( well it use to be like this but Nokia handporn now is like other nowadays! Now u can use it now u can’t or to a ladies when using vibrating mode feel so nice one moment & the next moment the handporn gone death ).

How about just adding a word or a few words to the word Kia. Allow me to add some other word to Kia & explain the totally different meaning! Among the Chinese, the word Kia cum from the Hokkien dialect. The following are some example!

Kina kia is how they refer to their children.

Da boh kia is to boy to them.

Zha boh kia is a girl to them.

Chiao kia is a bird to them.

Lang chiao kia is how they refer to a dic*khead ( so chiao kia is a bird but adding a lang which is dic*k to them, in front of a hokkien bird u becum a dic*khead! )

Seh kia is give birth.

Siao kia is a crazy kid ( see just a different pronunciation u end up being crazy )!

Mata kia is how they call a police ( mata is a Malay word for eye so police is eye people ).

Choo kia is a small house to them.

Huan nan kia is a Malay to them.

Keh leng kia is a Indian to them.

Deng lang kia is how they call a Chinese ( deng is long, lang is dic*k, so does this meant Chinese have long dic*k??? ) .

Jit pun kia is how they call a Japanese

Ang moh kia is how they call a Caucasian but ang is also red moh is hair so people with red hair is also call ang moh kia( no wander people ask me if I am a real ang moh do I have red hair? )

Pai kia is a bad guy to them.

Ho kia is a good guy to them.

Gong kia is a stupid guy to them.

So u can see that to a hokkien got so many different type of kia with totally different meaning!

Oh since the west have Ikia, are they the hokkien favorite furniture store?

And since I am ‘Hor ny Ang Moh’, what will a hokkien lady call me???

Friday, August 10, 2007

Any One Want Me????

Any one want me?

I am a cute fellow.

I can be your guard.

I can keep you company day & night, rain or shine.

My need are few & simple. All I need is love & companionship & a good house where I can call 'home'.

Even what I eat is simple, simple food is what I need 3 time a day is enough!

Any extra or special food like strew pork leg given to me will made me very very happy.

And for this I shall shower u with my all my love & affection for more then a hour!

In return I promise to guard u with my life if necessary.

I shall guard u whenever & wherever u r.

Yes, even when u r taking bath, changing cloths & even when u r in the toilet!

I shall follow u everywhere.

Yes, everywhere, to ur office, car, toilet & even go shopping with u!

I shall also give u all my bodily warm & whatsoever that u need & even pleasure!

I shall also be forever faithful to u & no one else but to u only!

So please take a look at me & say that u want to take me home with u......................







I am begging u....................

to take me............................



with u....................................

So do u want to take me home with u????

I received this pic ( the rest of the entry is my 'hor ny' idea )in my e-mail! Crack me up it did! As today is TGIF ( Thank God Its Friday ) I thought it is a good idea to post it up & cheer up my dear reader ( since all of u have a stressful week)! Have a nice weekend my dear reader!

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

How To Made Ur 'Pokeing' More Sexited...Part 4

A continuation of part 3 ,part 2 & part 1

Buy me a car! No car no gf! No gf meant no married! No married mean no babies! No babies mean no grandson! Don't u agree with me? Well in most case this is applicable to parent who can afford to buy a car for their kids & also parent who are desperate to hold & carried a baby that is their grandson( u must understand it has being a long time since our parent last carried a baby that is us )!

What! No car! Forget it! No car meant not date! I will never go out with u if u don't cum a fetch me in a car ( meant while I will give u all sort of reason to reject u, from having period all the time to having stomachache all the time )! So guy have no choice but to buy/borrow a car if he want to date a lady ( gone are the day when a lady will go out with a guy that she like, I am very sure that if Hor ny Ang Moh is to ask any ladies reader here out for a date on his bicycle he will get pant*ies, rotten egg & maybe even month-end bloo*dy pad throw at him )!

So a car is a must! It can do so many things & of cause cost so much & affect so many!But the most important thing is with a car u got a date! And if u got a date u can do so many activities with it! One of the activities is pokeing in a car!

One of the most sexiting way of pokeing is done in the car! It is most convenience ( as most people go dat*eing in a car, remember the saying ‘ I can’t find a gf without a car’ ) & if u know where to park ur car u can have a very enjoyable pokeing session!

Where to do park ur car to do pokeing? Car park is out of question as no privacy as people can have a look at ur action. Night time or dark tinted glass is of little use as any car with running engine attract attention & it is also dangerous as u could get robbed or worse both of u get poked! My suggestion is on some 'out of way' country road or perhaps some fruits orchard. But wherever it is do made sure that ur mobile phone can still be used. Just in case of emergency u can still call for help or in most case still can phone home to say u will be late for dinner!

So what type of car is suitable for pokeing? Well actually any car will do from the smallest like kancil to double cabin to a lorry even! How u do it? The back seat is the most suitable place as the space is bigger when both front seat is push forward ( however if ur car has only two door, the the front space is bigger ). Either the guy poke down into the ladies with her leg spray as wide as the inside of the car or the ladies sit on to the guy’s ‘bro’. Front seat position is also possible with the seat back rest extended to the max. Do remember to be extra careful when doing pokeing in front seat so as not to knock against the gear level as ur car is still running. Also do remember to open the windows slightly to let flesh air. And to ensure maximum privacy while doing pokeing in a car, the best time is when it is raining! Nobody will check on a car when is is raining cats & dogs.

Pokeing can also be done outside the car ( of cause when u r sure that there are nobody around ) standing up leading against the car or the lady can lie down on top of the car bonnet while the guy poke away standing ( the height of most car bonnet suitable for this pokeing method. Don't do this if u drive a 4x4 as the bonnet is too high unless both of u intended to do it on top of the its bonnet ). Do made sure the car bonnet is cool ( as when the car is still running this is not possible ). For car with sun roof additional method can be carried out as both of u can stand up in the car. U can even ask the lady to sit on the roof while u have a good lic*king time between her leg!

Finally according to my friend u can forget buying the car number ( after u do pokeing inside that car ) & bet it on 4-d, magnum. da-ma-cai or whatever! That car number will never cum out wan! I think this could be true as my former car which I do pokeing inside never cum out! However both my current car are still vir*gin. Number cum out several time already ( but whenever it cum out I didn't buy, why no luck wan arr??? Could this be the reason why some 2nd hand car that u buy number never cum out as the previous have done intensive pokeing inside? ).

To be continue........

Monday, August 06, 2007

Rm One Million in a horny fellow!!!!!

Proposition: If you Have $1,000,000.00…………………………

The first things that I did if I have this much of money with me is to change Rm560,000-00 into Rm1.00 notes. That will be a few sack full of Rm1.00 notes in gunny sack.

Then I will pay a visit to several of the Banks that I own money to. I will then visit the Bank's branch Manager & demand to settle all mine outstanding loan with that bank by paying in full! Yes, with all this Rm1.00 notes! He! He! The poor cashier will spend a few hours counting all the Rm1.oo notes!This I will do to all the bank that I own money to.

Why I do this?? I don't know. Maybe I just like the look of the Bank Manager's face when I settle all my loan in Rm1-00 notes! So am I bad..........

As for the Rm440,000-00 I will invested in Russia, buy up a big & nice house. After that I will try to get a Russian Pr. With this I will set up 'Hor ny Production House'. I will employed the most beautiful & different race of Russian Ladies! As long as they are beautiful they can apply to work in my 'production house' also they are willing to becum mother! They will of cause be well pay. In fact I am even willing to share profit with them as they are all share holder of my 'production house'!!! He! He! Still blur blur with what I am doing.............

Ok now I will advertise on the net ' Baby Available for childless couple! Different mother available! Father is big & handsome!' ( I will post up pic of all the beautiful ladies & mother to be on the sites, of cause the father is ur truly but no pic of me ) People can choose which lady they want their baby to be as mother. They can't choose the father but I will grantee them that the baby father is big & handsome!!!

This is how I spend my Rm1,000,000-00! The above way to spend Rm1,000,000-00 good or not! Oh I don't made any donation as almost anyone who do this tag have already made the donation so more then enough money!

Got this tag from a father !

Feel free to do this tag if u want! Have a nice weekend!

Saturday, August 04, 2007

Any one going to UK to watch ball kicking???

Anyone going to UK for vacation? And while u r in UK what do u do? Well I have being doing some ‘pokeing’ around & made some ‘discovery’. UK it seem is famous for playing ball! Kicking ball, that is soccer or football as its known in the UK. To all the football fan English Premier League need no introduction. So to all the football fan taking in a football match is a must! Oh before they start playing ball, I meant kicking ball, there are about 90 minutes of singing in the football pitch by the supporter for their favorite team. I suppose the fan will be singing their head off before the ball kicking begin. And during the game the fan will cheering & yelling their head off for their team.

Getting a Premium League ticket might be quite hard!You might be interested to try out some of the lesser known clubs in the Premiership if you don't mind which teams you see. It is usually easier to get ticket to see teams like Fulham ( London ), Middlesbrough ( North East England ) or Blackburn ( North West England ) in action. Or you can book your ticket long time in advance to see your favourite team like Liverpool, Chelsea, Manchester United or Arsenal here at visit Britain here you can find all that you need to know about English Premier League!

You can always made a tour to visit all the famous stadiums also if you can't made it to the games! You can get behind the scenes & have a look at the player changing room. And if you are lucky you can even have a chance to sit in the Manager's match-day seat! All this is organise by the clubs. For more detail u can check out visit Britain .

Well that will be one of the activities u do while in UK. But what about accommodation! After pokeing around in the Internet I poke into cheaperthanhotel ! Whoa! Their room rate start at on GBP 10 for 1 star London hotels all the way to 5 star London hotels from GBP 120 ( GBP 10 only! Cheaper then some local lodging house when u stay only a few hours to do some pokeing, we don’t consider the exchange rate here of cause ) ! Under cheaperthanhotel u can find cheap accommodations all over Europe! Also for top deal or last minute special & even Worldwide Car Hire u can find in cheaperthanhotel . As for football, the following are the 3 largest cities for football in the UK.

If u stay in London check out London Hotel . Here the local ball kicking clubs are:- Chelsea, Arsenal, Fulham & Tottenham.

If u stay in Manchester check out Manchester Hotel . The famous ball kicking club is of cause the Red Manchester United!

If u stay in Liverpool check out Liverpool Hotel . The ball kicking club here is Liverpool of cause!

If I have the money I will of cause pay London a visit now that I know accommodation will not cost me a bomb & pay Mr Bean a visit ( I wander if I can try out Mr Bean attic & decorated the Barkingham Palace Guard )!

So anyone going to UK?????

Friday, August 03, 2007

How To Made Ur 'Pokeing' More Sexited...Part 3

A continuation of part 2 & part 1

Pokeing done outside one's home is always sexiting. So where do u do the pokeing outside?

Hotel room

Hotel room is one good venue! It has all the comfort of home plus some more. It is always better to check in a better quality hotel as the comfort level is better, don’t try to save on this as u rent out a hotel room to enjoy urself with ur partner. A good hotel room will have a big size springy bed & a big size bathroom so that both of u can bath together. A springy bed always aid pokeing action ( I suppose this is why all hotel have springy bed but not everyone have springy bed at home as it is hot unless u have air-con, in fact I have a fibre king size bed it is cooling to sleep in but hard as a board ). Some hotel room also have big mirror fitted so u can also see urself in ‘action’. Do check for hidden camera but for hotel with star it is quite safe to say that it is camera free.


Unless both of u are working together or u invited ur partner over while u do overtime in the office, pokeing in office normally occur as ‘forbidden’ since it meant u r pokeing anyone else but ur usual partner. But this of cause made it so much more sexiting! Pokeing is done on office table, chair or even on the floor! It could be in the general office area, meeting room or even in conference room. It is not advisable to do pokeing in the fax or computer room as u might accidentally poke some button or switch! It is much cheaper as u don’t pay anythings but u have to watch out for any camera including hidden camera!

Among all the pokeing location outside one's home. Pokeing in office is the most risky! In term of being discovered ( u r not the only one with access to the office, ur boss have full access! So u r always pokeing with full alerts to any interruption. Beside this any phone ring is a big distraction. This affect the guy, as he can't poke with full force, the ladies of cause still enjoy herself to the max ) & actually there are little suitable space to do full pokeing sexerise. The only large enough space is the conference table or ur own big office table ( if u work in cubic office, u can forget doing pokeing on this type of table, it can never stand the weight of two people moving in unison ). Do remember to clear ur table ( even though sometime have to poke in quickly as the ladies/guys might change her/his mind ), watch out for staple, pen & paper clips! Do be careful so that u don't knock down the computer monitor or made ur keyboard wet! Please don't use the mouse to run all over her poo*sie! But then lady really enjoy it, if u run ur computer's mouse all over her we*t poo*sie, don't use optical mouse, use mouse running on ball. It is this ball rolling on her sensitive area that give her pleasure. After this mouse running, u will have to buy a new mouse! But if u r the Boss, then pokeing in office is the best location! Cum year-end when u as Boss have to do appraisal for ur stuff. As Boss u can always request ur 'hot' ladies stuff to stay back where more 'detail' & 'in dept' appraisal is needed ( see as Boss u can almost do what u want )!

Out door

It is most sexiting doing pokeing out in the open in nature. The problem is choosing the location. In the park? In some natural park ( don't ever try to do any pokeing activities here, nowadays digital cam-coder cum with zoom lens, u don't want to be ' orang yang terlanpau dalam xxx park' )? In some jungle clearing when u & ur partner go to do some camping?

Well my suggestion is to go to some fruits orchards off the main road & have some sort of picnic under the durian tree or rambutan tree. U can do ur pokeing on top of the picnic sheets but as we are in the rain forest region doing pokeing out in nature without any protective sheets is not encourage, just image all sort insects on the ground ( watch out for fire ants, it's bite is very painful, extra extra painful if it bite on ur 'bro' or on her poo*sie )! So do remember to bring along a big spray can of Ridsect not only against those ants but also against all the mosquitoes ( apparently mosquitoes are heat seeker so they will all target ur ‘bro’ standing at full attention as that happen to be the hottest part of ur body ). Since this is the fruits season pokeing outdoor in nature is not encourage as all the fruits orchard will be crawling with people.

To be continue...........

Thursday, August 02, 2007

This look nice or not??

I have a bowl of this last night! Homegrown peanut!!! Looking at the nuts does it remind u of somethings else..........

Wednesday, August 01, 2007

How To Made Ur 'Pokeing' More Sexited...Part 2

A continuation of part 1

For married couple……………..

Pokeing is done several time a day ( well it use to be for newly married ) & always in the bed room after going to bed or may be early morning. So this go on & on, by now u already have kids. Once u have kids pokeing is no longer a ‘must have’ activities. Even without kids couple who have being married for a few months will started to feel a bit bored with the usual pokeing. So how to sexited ur pokeing?

U have being doing pokeing in the bedroom. So how about doing pokeing in the living room? How about doing pokeing while watching ‘nice’ DVD or VCD on TV ? This I guarantee u will made ur pokeing so much more interesting & maybe intensive! U can also try out the various style shown in the ‘nice’ DVD or VCD ( sometime the style shown is not applicable as in most case for show only, not enjoyable or very tiring or ur partner not willing to try it out )! But sometime the problem is that some guy cum in record time. But ladies u can always recharge him faster while watching the ‘nice’ movie. Of course ladies also get high easier while watching this ‘nice’ movie! U can do pokeing on the sofa or on sofa table or even on the floor. Do remember to turn down the TV volume! U don't wan to let the whole neighbour listen to all the 'ahhh' & 'ohhh' sound. Do be careful while doing pokeing in the living room don't get so sexited & pokeing so intensely that u tear up the sofa pillow or knock down the TV set or worse still fall down from the small sofa table & if ur sofa table is made of glass don't ever do pokeing on it!

Beside living room, how about in the study room? While ur partner is doing his/her office work ( don’t do it, if he/she doing is important work ) u can pretend to be a secretary to ur hubby or a boss to ur wife! ( pretend u r poking someone else but ur hubby or wife, but do pretending in ur mind don't ever let him/her know that u r thinking of pokeing someone else, u will get a wack on the head from her, 'bro gone home' from him ). Pokeing is more sexiting if u think u r poking someone else or being poke by someone else! Do be careful when pokeing in study room as u don't want any pen or pencil pokeing into u or ur partner if the study table is not cleared properly!

Kitchen is another sexiting place to do poking! Don’t u think ur partner look se*xy while cooking ( a lady in office wear doing cooking did look very 'inverting', as she prepare a quick meal for bf )? But do be very careful when pokeing in kitchen. Don’t even try to poke ur partner from behind by lifting up her dress when she is frying ur food as she is most sexited when she saw ur ‘bro’ standing up at full attention! U don’t want her to fry a big sausage instead of verge! Forget what u see in the 'nice' ang moh movie as ang moh normally don’t fry their food! Pokeing can be done on kitchen table ( I know that it is disgusting if u know poking is done on that table but then it is OK as only u know & ur gust don't so ur gust will still be happily eating away at that table. So next time u have dinner at ur friend/client place, do u think pokeing take place on this dinner table? ) or on kitchen chair. Do be careful while doing pokeing in kitchen, switch off the fire stove & clear the kitchen table of any spoon or fork or whatever. Don't get carried away by the pokeing that u knock down bowls, plate or even ur rice cooker & micro wave oven!

Another sexiting place to have pokeing is the bathroom( the bathroom must be large enough )!This is a very good place to have pokeing! Cleaning can be done at the same time so of cause very very clean. Suc*king & lic*king all taste very good & natural! This is a good place to do a lot of fore*play! However do be very careful with all this activities in the bathroom as it is very slippery with all the soapy water. Do take note that if ur gf is not the 'we*t' type U might find it difficult to poke in after u have cleaned her's hole ( in this case more suc*king, lic*king,nibbling to get her we*t against ). Pokeing can be done on three legged method so either one will be on one leg! So do keep ur balance so that u don't fall down on ur 'bro'( it is very very painful ). Pokeing can also be done in the bathtub or sitting on the edge of the bathtub. Kindly noted that it is not advisable to do pokeing is water or soapy water as it is not good for the lady for water entering a lady in there ( yes it is shown in 'nice' movie, but it is for show only )!

'I can’t do all that with the kids around'. That is the normal valid reason. So how about sending ur kids off to ur in-law or ur parent during the weekend? U can even sent them off to Sunday School! So without kids around it is always quality ‘pokeing’ time to spend together!

That is all on place where u can sexited ur boring pokeing. Mainly in the house. Next post will be outside the house!!

To be continue…………….