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Monday, April 21, 2008

My Boss Fark/Fcuk Me Strong Strong!!!

As the head of a sale unit in a big organization I have to attend ‘sale convention’ every year. This ‘sale convention’ is normally held in a 5 star Hotel convention hall & of cause I get to stay in this hotel too! In this ‘sale convention’ which is attended by all sale units thought out the whole country, all the sale units head is supposed to learn new tricks in sales & yet more products & of cause to know the organization’s policies & aims.

In actual case, in my opinion I have to attended such ‘sale convention’ to have my ‘hor ny’ brain ‘washes’ with new ideas to pushes for sales & yet more sales! And also in all this ‘sale convention’ will be included ‘motivation’ course which is suppose to motivate the head of sale unite so that the head will be so ‘motivated’ that he will go back home to ‘motivated’ his sale stuff also.

Oh yes! I am most ‘motivated’ during the ‘motivating’ course but to me ( My hor ny opinion! ) the real ‘motivation’ for me is MONEY! Yes! For MONEY I will get all the sale u want! But if I get ‘peanut’ for all my sale effort then I will give u ‘peanut’ sale! And that is my big problem!

Apart from this, the last ‘program’ of the ‘sale convention’ is have a ‘meet the boss’ session! By boss I meant the organization owner/president/ceo/Tan Sri & whatsoever whereby he/she will present award for the best sale unit! After this we get to present our annual sale report to our real boss the sale department head! This I consider is the real purpose of having ‘sale convention’!

Yes! I consider her my boss as my salary, salary increment & whatsoever is base on her recommendations to human resource department! If I do well in the sale I will get my salary increments or else I will be in very deep shit or worse still get transfer to work in ‘Abu Dhabi’( No such luck lah! I don’t mind working oversea! The real case is, I will be transfer to work in KL with a RM2,000-00 salary! This is a polite way to say u r fired! )!!!

In my organization those who do well get to sit in front ( So whatever this fellow suggest will get the boss attention! ) whereas those to do badly get to sit in the back ( I don’t really mind sitting at the back as some ‘meeting’ is so boring that I fall asleep! ) and thus I found myself sitting right at the very back & in fact there are no one behind me! Sigh………….!!!! I better get myself ready for all the incumming bomb, missile & maybe a few pens or even a chairs throw at me by the sale Boss!

And so the reports began by each & every sale heads! He or she will report the sale figures & also how he/she did the sale & how or what he/she will do or plan to do to further improve the sale figures………….Blad blad blad & yada yada yada………this go on & on & on…………. Since I am the last it is almost 6.30 pm before I have my turn to submit my sale performers ( In the meant time I fall asleep! )!

I did all that I can to secure sale & more sales but compare to other I just happen to be the last & so on & so froths………..blah blah blah………yada yada yada & more yada yada ………..( In fact I give her 1,001 reasons why I am the last! )!!!

After this it is her turn to ‘fires’ me! Wah laued!!!!!!!!!!!!!! She is……….Her mouth is so…. So…. So…… like a big canon! She is like firing canon balls at me & some more also got bombs & missiles cumming out of her mouth! So of cause all my 1,001 reasons all got shot to pieces!

‘U r one of the tops sale performer 3 years ago! What the happen to u!!!!???’ ( Yes! Three years ago I am a top gun! I sit right next to the big Boss! But for all my sale efforts I get pay by ‘peanuts’ which to me is not really worth the efforts! In fact I almost have to ‘sell’ myself to ‘secure’ sale! But I can’t tell her this unless I want to be in ‘Holland’!!! ) Blah blah blah…………. She ‘fired’ me some more!

Then the phone rang! Phew!!! Save by the phone! It is now almost 7.00pm! Meeting ended! Everybody lets off a sight of relieved & hurried out of the convention hall like scared rabbits!

‘Hor ny! U stay behind!’ WTF! Wah lauehhhhhhhhhhhh!!! She is not finished with me yet! By now I am alone with she & she look at her watch…………….

‘Tell me do u still want to work as sale head?

‘Yes! Mdm! I do! Please give me a chance! I will do any things!’

‘Meet me in my room at 9.00pm as this convention hall will be use for other function! I am not thought with u yet! I shall then evaluated my recommendation on yours sale performance! Oh! Have a bath before u meet me! U r sweating like a pig!’

‘Yes! Mdm! Tq very much for giving me a chance!’

Dam! I am in very deep shit! What shall I do? With no salary increment or worse still what if she deducts my salary? What if she decided to transfer me to KL ( Where it is a very dangerous & very expensive place to work! )!

To be continued…………..

To all my dear readers what should I do????

Updated..............And this is what HAPPEN!!!!!


Simon Seow said...

Quits and look for another job that pays good commission.

Yinsi Yat said...

Woah! your tension also very strong-strong woh.

[fong88] said...

look for other job and fire her back..LOL!!

Hor ny Ang Moh said...

Hi Simon! Wellcum! Aiyoh! Find job very hard leh! Tq very much for ur comment!

Hi Yinsi Yat! Yalloh! Tension very strong strong!

Hi Fong88! He! He! Wait for part two!!! Then u see what happen!

Canucklehead said...

You should of course give boss lady the fcuking that she so needs and deserves. She see you get 'big raise' in pants and give you big raise in salary. It's win-win!

Hor ny Ang Moh said...

Hi canucklehead! Ha! Ha! Good idea! Waite for part two!

lankapo said...

one thins baout bossy woman is that they like sweet talks

just mulut manis jaa

she maybe kiss u in the lips haha

Hor ny Ang Moh said...

Hi Lankapo! He! He! U r right!